Why I Kept Explaining My Kids’ Symptoms Away — and Why Those Explanations Almost Replaced the Pattern
Each explanation made sense. The pattern was what I missed.
I always had an explanation ready.
If my kids were tired, it was a long week. If they were irritable, it was age or overstimulation. If they complained of aches, it was growth.
None of those explanations were wrong.
They just weren’t the whole story.
Reasonable explanations didn’t mean nothing deeper was happening.
Why Logical Explanations Feel So Reassuring
Explanations create relief.
They make uncertainty feel contained and manageable.
Every time I explained something away, my nervous system relaxed — even if the symptoms didn’t.
An explanation can feel like resolution even when nothing has changed.
Understanding something intellectually didn’t mean I was understanding it contextually.
When Each Symptom Is Treated as Its Own Event
I looked at moments, not sequences.
A bad morning here. A hard evening there. A rough weekend followed by a better day.
This kept me from noticing what I later wrote about in why my kids’ symptoms followed the same timeline.
Patterns disappear when moments are isolated.
Explaining symptoms individually erased what they were showing collectively.
How Familiar Explanations Delayed My Response
Stress. Sensitivity. Transitions. Emotions.
These explanations were familiar and socially accepted.
They felt safer than questioning the environment my kids lived in every day.
It’s easier to explain a child than to question a home.
Familiar stories kept me from asking unfamiliar questions.
What Finally Made the Explanations Fall Apart
The turning point wasn’t a new symptom.
It was contrast.
Away from home, the same explanations no longer fit. The symptoms softened without effort.
This mirrored the clarity I described in why my kids’ symptoms quieted when we left the house.
When improvement happens without intervention, explanations need revisiting.
Relief elsewhere made my explanations feel incomplete.
What Changed When I Stopped Needing Each Symptom to Make Sense
I didn’t throw out logic.
I widened the lens.
I stopped asking whether each symptom could be explained and started asking whether the pattern could be ignored.
Patterns don’t need permission from logic to be real.
Letting go of tidy explanations helped me see the full picture.
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