How to Let Progress Become Normal Without Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop
When things feel steadier, but your body still expects reversal.
Even when progress stuck around, I didn’t relax.
I kept listening for the sound of things falling apart.
Calm felt like something I had to earn every day.
I was living inside improvement — but not trusting it.
Waiting for collapse didn’t protect progress — it kept my body braced.
This tension was quieter than panic, but just as tiring.
Why “the other shoe” thinking lingers
My system had learned unpredictability.
Improvement still felt new.
Familiarity takes time to register as safety.
Stability didn’t feel permanent yet — it felt borrowed.
The nervous system trusts repetition more than reassurance.
This expectation grew out of the fear that progress might disappear, which I wrote about in What to Do When You’re Afraid Progress Will Disappear .
How vigilance quietly replaced presence
I was less afraid — but more watchful.
I kept checking in on how I felt.
Improvement became something to monitor instead of inhabit.
I stayed alert even when nothing was asking for attention.
Hyperawareness can persist even after danger passes.
This echoed what I had experienced earlier when I didn’t trust feeling better yet, which I explored in What to Do When You Start Feeling Better but Don’t Trust It Yet .
What helped progress settle into the background
I stopped asking if today would undo yesterday.
I let routines carry me instead of constant assessment.
Life didn’t need commentary.
I gave progress fewer instructions and more space.
Progress feels safer when it’s allowed to be ordinary.
This shift became possible once I stopped chasing full recovery and allowed progress to be incomplete, which I wrote about in How to Move Forward Without Chasing “Full Recovery” .
How safety became familiar instead of fragile
Nothing dramatic happened.
Calm simply repeated.
Over time, my body stopped treating it as temporary.
Safety didn’t announce itself — it accumulated.
Familiar calm teaches the body more than sudden relief ever could.
This was built on the foundation of stabilization, which I described in What Stabilization Looks Like (Before Healing) .
FAQ
How long does it take to stop expecting collapse?
Longer than I thought.
It faded as calm became repetitive.
Is vigilance always a bad thing?
No.
It just didn’t need to run constantly.
What if I still check in sometimes?
I did too.
Less checking came naturally with time.